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This book is about how to find your footing with a bipolar husband or bipolar wife and preserve your sanity in a marriage or relationship that’s built on quicksand. Your bipolar husband or bipolar wife may make you feel that everyday is a new dawn. Deep down you know nothing in your past has prepared you for what will happen in your bipolar marriage today, tomorrow or next year.
It’s a given: You love your bipolar wife or bipolar husband very much. “Bipolar” is not one of the top 10 adjectives you use to describe the love-of-your-life to other people. “Bipolar Disorder” may not even be in the top 100!
But if you’re like me, “bipolar disorder” is on your mind all the time. Your bipolar radar flashes when you second guess your bipolar husband’s financial decision making. Your bipolar radar arms when your bipolar wife drowns you in love and affection…because you know, very soon, you’ll be hunkered down protecting yourself from a painful verbal assault and threats of divorce.
Many times I diagnosed my own condition as PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder). But it wasn’t “Post.” It is ongoing. So I decided to “stop the madness” on my part and learn how to “fish or cut bait.”
I learned how to handle “my problem” of how to be married to a bipolar husband. Then I wrote a book to help other husbands, wives and partners, married to Bipolar Disorder (yes, it does seem that way most of the time!), who are caught in the same love/chaos/trauma drama I was in.
This is the book you’ll read when you’ve already read the hundreds of other websites, books and newsletters, attended all the bipolar support groups and workshops and exhausted the patience of your friends and family – and you still don’t have answers for YOU about the best way to be married to a bipolar husband or a bipolar wife.
Here Are Just a Few of the Questions My Readers Have Asked Me About Marriage to a Bipolar Husband or BiPolar Wife (…And My Response!)
Question: “Why do their moods change to where you absolutely do not believe they love you and you wonder whether or not they’re even capable of love?”
Answer: IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT!
Question: “We have raging arguments and we’re not very close. How can I get him to understand and accept that he has a problem and go get help?”
Answer: IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT!
Question: “Nine months after I divorced my bipolar husband, he killed himself by hanging. He was sober and this ‘depressed’ cycle wasn’t different from hundreds of others he’d been through–even when he was off his medication. How could I have known?”
Answer: IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT!
Think about it: Haven’t you already done everything you could think of plus more, to create a happy marriage to your bipolar spouse?
Your in-laws think you’re an angel, your friends think you’re nuts. You don’t know what to believe anymore but you know something’s broken and needs to be fixed. NOW. TODAY.
The only thing left is to take some of that good lovin’ you’ve been dishing out, and spend it on yourself. “Married To Mania” Is the owner’s manual on “How To Take Care of You” when you’re married to a bipolar husband or bipolar wife!
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Let me Repeat: The chaos in your relationship is not your fault. When you love a bipolar husband or bipolar wife, your relationship is not on a level playing field with other loving relationships or marriages you’ve admired.
The relationship problem-solving skills that you learned from your relationship role models: your parents, your friends–even TV couples like “Lucy and Ricky” don’t work in your marriage. Those relationships–yes, even the fantasy TV storylines (!)–will never have the same roadblocks and heartaches that you tackle every single day of your life with a bipolar husband or bipolar wife.
How much do you REALLY know about Marriage To a Bipolar Spouse? Even if you’ve read a few books, surfed online and gone to a few support groups, you are no match for your bipolar husband or bipolar wife. In fact, you are at a tremendous disadvantage.
You Are in Bipolar Psychology “Kindergarten”. Your bipolar husband or bipolar wife has a “PhD” in Bipolar Disorder. This “degree” may not help him find a “cure” or steer him toward acceptance of his illness, but he’s been through a lifetime of mental machinations that you will never understand or keep pace with. It’s downright exhausting!
Here Are the Facts:
1. The divorce rate is 2 to 3 times higher for families with mental illness than in the general population (which is already 50% and rising!).
2. 60% of Bi polars have drug, alcohol substance abuse problems or other addictions like internet pornography.
3. 1 in 6 of those with Bipolar Disorder commit suicide.
As much as you may love your bipolar husband or bipolar wife, your future will be seriously altered by having this person in your life. Whether you decide to stay in your relationship, or cut the ties and move on, you must base your decision on facts, not emotions. And that’s exactly what I’ll show you how to do in “Married To Mania.”?How many times have you asked yourself these questions?
– What can I do to make our relationship less stressful?
– Will he ever get better?
– Will she ever be able to stop taking her medicine?
– Why can’t I convince him to trust me?
– Will I ever be able to trust him?
– Why is he so hard on everyone around him who loves him?
– How can I predict when her mood swings will occur?
– How can I protect my children?
– Should I marry my bipolar girlfriend/boyfriend?
– Should I divorce my bipolar husband?
– I love him. Is there any hope for us?
“Married To Mania” lays out more than 15 proven concepts you’ll want to read or listen to over and over again so you can practice new behaviors that I guarantee will make your life more livable–regardless of whether you stay with your bipolar partner or leave him. (I say “him,” but these strategies are for any spouse or significant other: husband or wife, girlfriend or boyfriend of a bipolar partner.)
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